Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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