It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
