With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
