id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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