Me. At least after what I've been through.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
