That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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