It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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