Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
