I'm going to jail i love you
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
