Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
