Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
We're too hungover to prance.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
