We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
