She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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