Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
