I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
