I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
We talked him into tasing himself.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
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