Soap is not a condiment
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
