Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
