he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize