I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
