i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I FOUND THE LEGS
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
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