Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
