How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
My life is pants optional.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize