Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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