it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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