well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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