I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
It's official drugs can't kill me
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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