There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I will be naked everywhere
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
