OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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