"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
