white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
