I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
