yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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