Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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