idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
one two three fourrrrnication!
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
