Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Did I show you my penis last night?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize