..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
