guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
