I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize
