Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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