when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
