no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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