Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
