If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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