it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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