I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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