I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Randomize
