I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize