fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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