***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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