tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
